I will never forget the very first time I cry for realize that you might more important than me. Yes, I will never forget that day.
I don't know what's wrong with you (or me?), that you never regard me the way you supposed to.
That ignorant look and 'who are you?' intonation every time I talked to you.
Do I ever do something wrong to you?
Aren't you the one who get all the attention?
Why don't they treat you the way they did to me? Why they always blame me for any tiny mistake I did, but never do the same to you?
Why I'm the one who always given rules to follow, while you could just easily slipped from it?
Why, with every efforts I did, I never seem look 'good' moreover 'great' for them?
If only I want to do the same thing like you do to me, but I can't.
I just don't have that "Black Swan" in me.
I sometimes hate this very-fragile side of me, that couldn't take any bad deal from everyone - those who supposed to care and love me - that I expect not. It's because I know that they feel the same way.
Do you ever think about this? To value others as you want to be valued? Or do you just respect them whose give "advantages" for you?
I never met anyone else that so intolerable, selfish, and irresponsible. But again, I might the only 'worthy' person that deserve all that "treatment".
Why you never change, I don't know.
There so many tears that silently fall because of you.
And maybe so many more to come.
And like many days before, I'll play tough.
